How to Not Make Custodians Hate You

This is a friendly Public Service Announcement to the general public.  It's very likely that you all see custodians on a regular basis.  Now what you may not know is that custodians are basically superheroes.  We are behind every magic clean up and we are the ones that save your hide when you lock your keys in your office.  Custodians are not the kind of people you want to piss off.  We have access to many unsavory chemicals that you wouldn't want used against you in a revenge plot (which, honestly, wouldn't happen.  Custodians are actually really nice).  So to keep your custodians happy, here's what you shouldn't do.

1. Don't be an idiot.
2. If there is a cart blocking the bathroom with a "Closed for Cleaning" sign anywhere by it, chances are that it's closed. 
3. If the bathroom is closed, don't ask the custodians if you can use the bathroom.  Like seriously, we will make fun of you.
4. Boys, LEARN HOW TO AIM
5. Throwing trash on the floor is still considered "littering".  We already have jobs and lots of work to do, there is no need to give us more work to do
6. Pretty please try and throw up in the trashcan and not on the carpet.
7. Get a sippy cup or learn how to not spill
8. Yes, I'm aware of the event that is going on soon, there is no need to tell me about it while I'm cleaning the bathroom so that it's clean for said event
9. Don't tell us how to do our job.  
10. I have seen things you can't even imagine.  That being said, do not try to one-up the poop explosion of '15. Just....  Don't....
11. Don't assume we are inferior to you just because we clean up crap.  I am a pilot, what have you accomplished?
12. Please don't ignore signs that say "Closed for Cleaning".  We deal with chemicals that you don't want to inhale or get on your skin.  Be safe.  Wait until we are done.
13. Adapt.  There is another staircase and/or another bathroom just down the hall.  Calm down.
14. If you want your office cleaned, all you have to do is let us know nicely.  We will totally clean it for you, but we don't have psychic powers and can't magically know that you want it cleaned.
15. We are people just like you.  Treat us with respect and we won't hate you. Seems like a fair trade to me :)